Personal Post Whine Whine Moan Moan
5 Mar 2013 08:56 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
stockingsandseamsMy assignment is here & I'm really excited by it - my recip seems to love all the things I love best about this fandom (by which I mean, all of the ladies being with other ladies and sometimes smooching them) so it looks like I can just write something I would love to read and hopefully that will all work out fine! I'm not sure I've really got a feel for whether or not there's much of a treating culture, but there are a couple of prompts in letters that look interesting.
I quietly took my toys home from a kink meme that wasn't being run to my tastes, and now I feel bad because I had a few WIPs on there. I want to try and finish them but there has been so much wank at that place - and about the pairings in two out of four fics I want to finish writing - that my motivation's kind of vanished. I still need to finish up some things for my trope_bingo soon, so we'll see if that "unblocks" me some! Otherwise I'll try to finish them off well but damn, that wank has really soured me on some pairings I used to like. And I think that some requests have ruined my ability to spot troll prompts but that's a whole 'nother issue.
My depression has really been kicking my arse lately, and as much as I loved having my friend come out to France to visit me, I feel like I hadn't noticed how sad I really was until she was there reminding me what it felt like to be happy.
And a two-minute plot bunny turned into a giant fic requiring a shit-tonne of research into the Soviet Union & military intelligence during the Cold War but I actually really want to write this. Fuck fixing the memory loss at the end of WS#14; I was promised Cold War spy games and all I saw was Bucky punching people and Natasha sitting in a graveyard. I think we all know what needs fixing more there, really! It's surprisingly difficult to find resources outside Cambridge libraries. I know it's a terrible thing to think, but if I were to stay on for my PhD then at least I would have all the best resources for fic research. Not that fandom should be a factor or anything. Ahem.
I quietly took my toys home from a kink meme that wasn't being run to my tastes, and now I feel bad because I had a few WIPs on there. I want to try and finish them but there has been so much wank at that place - and about the pairings in two out of four fics I want to finish writing - that my motivation's kind of vanished. I still need to finish up some things for my trope_bingo soon, so we'll see if that "unblocks" me some! Otherwise I'll try to finish them off well but damn, that wank has really soured me on some pairings I used to like. And I think that some requests have ruined my ability to spot troll prompts but that's a whole 'nother issue.
My depression has really been kicking my arse lately, and as much as I loved having my friend come out to France to visit me, I feel like I hadn't noticed how sad I really was until she was there reminding me what it felt like to be happy.
And a two-minute plot bunny turned into a giant fic requiring a shit-tonne of research into the Soviet Union & military intelligence during the Cold War but I actually really want to write this. Fuck fixing the memory loss at the end of WS#14; I was promised Cold War spy games and all I saw was Bucky punching people and Natasha sitting in a graveyard. I think we all know what needs fixing more there, really! It's surprisingly difficult to find resources outside Cambridge libraries. I know it's a terrible thing to think, but if I were to stay on for my PhD then at least I would have all the best resources for fic research. Not that fandom should be a factor or anything. Ahem.
